When death meets Stand up comedy
Reflections om my first Stand Up Comedy course
Hi, I’m Louise
I love trying out new things
Talking about taboo topic
And I started 2 extracurricular activities in 2022.
I was going to call them hobbies
But that might be a stretch
I’ve started seeing a therapist
And I did a stand up comedy course.
What have they got in common you might ask?
One is me paying a stranger sit in a room and ask me questions make me squirm
The second was me paying to make jokes in front of a bunch of strangers, that also made me squirm.
What else do they have in common…beyond pushing my own comfort zone?
They’ve helped me to process and talk about the inevitable.
Death and taxes…
Almost
Just ways of exploring death, dying and grief.
(Slight side note — it might seem crass me sharing this on the eve of The Queen’s Funeral. But in the UK we’ve found ourselves with an extra bank holiday and a smidge of extra time to do the last bit of editing.)
But I degrees…
The therapist is helping me to really work through some of the unprocessed inter generational grief in my family that I realise has been weighing heavy on me for a long time.
And the stand up — perhaps a less clear link
I know I want to contribute to supporting a shift in culture and practice in how we talk about death and grief
And I guess I decided not to go too serious
Well aware I could risk of turning people off
So figured making people laugh might be one way of doing this.
Sustainable Stand Up — with a tagline “stand up for what matters” was perfect
And it felt like I was onto a good thing
The fact that even on telling people I was doing the stand up comedy course, got a guaranteed laugh from my nearest and dearest
Not sure what that says about how they perceive me though.
On sharing in our second class my intention to write about death as part of my very first stand up set
I was reminded that this was advanced topic for a beginners show.
But I find the thought of talking about death is often worse than doing it
A friend of my said recently
Louise, what do is that you just hold these spiky taboo topics in your hand
But when you look close and realise holding a baby hedgehog all rolled up
And they’re cute and tender and actually full of life and potential.
If 2022 was trying out new hobbies
In 2021 had the urge to write
I had lots of reflections on my work experiences from the previous 10 years
I found I actually quite liked writing
But turns out I don’t like editing.
Writing jokes proved to be just another way of writing
One I found surprisingly enjoyable
I had flashes of ideas in unexpected moments, while cycling back from the park , through observing micro behaviours — specifically cleaning and dressing up — of my family
Even in the middle of the night I’d have words and phrases come to me, along with the urge to quickly grab my phone and dive under the covers to capture it before words and lines would slowly disappear like the darkness at dawn.
I went into this new endeavour with distant aspiration to be the 2020’s, sustainable version, of the Marvellous Mrs Maisal…
Ok, that was always going to be a stretch
And through this process I have come to realise that Mrs Maisal is a flawed show….
She spends zero time writing let alone memorising her sets in the series and more time each day than I make a month in choosing her extravagant outfits.
I’ve always hated that question of ‘what do you do’ never knowing quite what what to say
That should be a taboo question
So I loved being able to infuse and juxtapose my work with organisations and boards, my peculiar teenage collections with my role as a mother.
If traditional communications and ways of presenting yourself approaches treat work and life separate
I felt for once, through the process of writing a 5 minute set
I could integrate the different parts of my life into one coherent narrative
In a way that didn’t leave people looking confused about what I do but I do
And even cracked a few laughs
A revelation.
And I’m sure writing a blog as if it’s a comedy set is a total faux pax,
But I did say I liked trying out new things…
Big thanks to Belina creating a terrifically terrifying, loving and beautiful space for us to play with the art of stand up
And to all my fellow co-learners for being braving and trying this new thing together
I’d highly recommend this process to anyone curious —the next course starts in October.
Thank you and goodnight!
— — — —
P.S If you‘re interested in seeing very first comedy first set, here’s the link, perfectly imperfect, but our task was to “aim for average” 😉
